As my light becomes dark

I intertwine my words and vision into woven light

Tuesday, November 30, 2010


Fumbling with the straws
Grappling and juggling them
In my fingers
Where is the long one?
Hidden among the short ones
The likelihood of my success
Muddled amongst the coloured
Without reason, my hopeless
Scrambling fingers
Spoiling and stumbling
They are failing me
                Failing me


The winds as they change
The blossom does sway
Dancing in the light
Swinging, caught in the breeze
Destiny wrapped in the warmth
As spring exhales it’s breathe
A hymn clings to the golden thread
The embrace dressed in jasmine scent
While petals begin to fall
Whispers of tomorrows hope reflect
The wind will change
And the spirit will drift
A heart loves you


Sunday, November 28, 2010


inspired love
walk in light

                    walk in light

shadows of the spirit
fade with time
that sway like shoes hung
from an overhead wire
doing pirroettes through
the clouds and distant sky
as the sun and moon move
reflecting the glow
the notes are caught in the breeze
that balance on the edge
as the inner dawn breaks
the darkened claws
the ghost haunting
no longer in control
the yellow step unseen
catching the step
pushing the soul to fall
without strings
toward the darkened ground
screaming sounds
trapped in the sorrowed heart
watching as the pride
is smashed into tiny pieces
coloured red, purple and green
the colour leaking all over the
darkened ground
the soul
and the swaying spirit
walk in light

            walk in light

Tuesday, November 23, 2010


I will always love you, and I remember you always at this time........

You left
You couldn’t stay
You had to leave
You went away
I hoped my love would be enough
My love for you
My love for you
Have you woken in a place I will never see?
Have you for forgotten this life?
Have you forgotten me?
Why did I not listen?
Why did I not hear?
I’m sure you tried to tell me
I’m sure you made it clear
Was I nothing to your heart?
And nothingness tore out your soul?
Tore the soul from your heart?
No warmth, no love
No longer you felt whole
Now there is nothing left
Like the dust of the earth
As the ashes rose
Is that all you’re worth?
Your spirit drifted away
And my heart it did close
A moment in time
As your spirit rose
As I closed my heart
I also closed my eyes
I let out a cry
And cried my goodbyes
Why didn’t you scream at me?
Scream, howl and cry
Maybe I would have heard you
Instead you chose to die
I have been there
Stared pain in the face
Nothing worth loving
Nothing but blackness
Nothing but hate
My head full of hatred
My body full of dread
You could have ripped out my heart
Held it, felt it
My heart too felt dead
Shades and shadows of death
Loomed all around
The doors felt closed
In a place underground
Where did I lose myself?
On a path made for me
It was a map of my life
But I felt lost
In a life which that did not deserve me
Like you I wanted to die
And go far away
But something saved me
It was life, my life
My soul
As seasons change
I feel your soul is free
I feel your spirit
Do you feel me?
But as I say goodbye
I cry tears for you
I cry
I cry
I’ll always love you

Thursday, November 18, 2010


Willow weeps downward
A kiss upon water’s edge                       
Drowns the spirit in stifled love

Caged wings fly inward
            Fluttering dreams float downward
The heart craves outward

Wednesday, November 17, 2010


The question

When one touch unfolds the suffocated presence
You trap me in the colours
Embedded in your heart.
Woven between the shadows forming a river in your soul
life changes we unfold
In cycles of change
a mystical experience (oneness)
Where level of consciousness
covers our skin.

Lifting out of oneself
Accelerated by transformation
Being questioned
Our spirits are challenged
And urgency and intensity
Fold around our deep visions
Wrapped in thoughts feelings and impulses
Where touch is changed
Motivating values and the perceived light.

As time passes freely through the air
The unfamiliar slowness
Turning in the midst of fear
Spinning quickly bringing into the present
The dreams intuition altering the function
Memories perception feels the awareness change
As the light falls and the water caught
Behind the invisible armour
Melting the unconscious
Into the infinite unknown, where sparks of light
Illuminate the insight and individuality
The emptiness where the water flows through thoughts
As a dimly sensed thought exists

Finally released

Tuesday, November 16, 2010


A silent heart waits for the break
Toward the end
The broken spirit begins to mend
Stripped back to a floating core
The spirit to find its wings and move
Toward the end

Toward the end

Saturday, November 13, 2010


Remember what I promised you?
Times repression aches
The feeling of being late
Hangs among us
Where moments are no longer

Tuesday, November 9, 2010


I wear my skin like an invisible cape
Hiding my soul which floats
Amongst the rubble and mess
The clutter fills the pit
The scent wafting full of disdain
Lost love reeking of pain
Anger lies in broken glass
Among the sounds of shouting
And lies and unheard truths
Crumbled between unwashed mistakes
Hate, floating in a murky filled jar
Slowly decaying
Fragments of empty apologies
Scattered throughout the room
Ripped up visions of the future in
Overflowing boxes
Piles of past manuscripts
Stacked in a corner
Reaching for the roof
That has been painted in nightmares
Of scared lonely nights
My invisible cape looks dirtied
From the scum and bruises and mess
There is nowhere to hide
I look around
There is no hope of finding my heart


My heart is open
And all I was, is shown
The ripple of doubt
Flows in and out of my shore
Dampening the sands of self
The dreams seep into my mind
As the sun and moon cross paths
The notes of my tune
Empty from my mouth
Like a hollow strumming noise
My offering
Is given up
Is it a gift
Or a curse?

Sunday, November 7, 2010


The image not black or white
My infant crying in your heart
Below the shell
That sits on the shelf
Slightly cracked
Glistening light
Cradled around the mutated life
Crammed in the cup
How will she fly home
When the heart can't settle
Knowing she will break
On her landing
The changed mind
Reminds her of unspoken words
The silence that has been broken
By hate
Dirt falls in the corners of the room
From the distracted listening
She shouts silent demands
The empty room finds it echo
Its response scares her
Sounding like a distant creator
Draped in a luminous darkness
The black glow she thought
Had long gone
But her eyes now ache from the concentration
Of watching
As she waits for her time
I don't understand you
Your feeling
Your presance
That fills sthe space
That you drown me in
A liquid muddy water
that clings to the wall of
Muted yellows
Smudging the images
That are imprinted into the surface
You shiver as the black air wraps around
You and your shadow
That merges upon the wooden floor
Your hope caught in the nape
Of your shadows neck
That too fades
Time does not change anything
Time changes time
Time is all that remains


For anyone who knows me, and for those who don't, I loooovvveeeee Kasey Chambers and tonight Jules and myself went to her "Little Bird" show (yep, take note, LITTLE BIRD, there is a theme) I have been to every show of hers, (but no I am not one of those obsessed fans, who wait at the stage door, clutching paraphernalia for my idol to sign) we saw those people, and good on em, waiting, chain smoking in anticipation for their idol.  But I just don't get it, do they realise their idol has finished work for the day and they want to go be normal like the rest of us.  I just don't get that idea of "wanting" more from someone just because they are famous.  They are human, with feelings and beings and desires.  They are not made to meet our needs or desires.  Especially after we have just been treated to almost two hours of our idol at their most. 

These people I concluded tonight are the same people who pushed in front of me in the line for the merchandise (I was buying my niece a little Kasey Chambers doll!!), they push in at the entry door (when its allocated seating, don't get that!!), they run for the toilets.  They sit behind you in the theater repeating "play The Pines, they never play The Pines" or the people in front who aren't happy with their seats (4 rows from the front, they were brilliant seats!!!) they are the same people who cut in when leaving the jam packed car park and then they are the people who are waiting at the stage door for Kasey to leave...where I began.  Makes me wonder about human kind.....human kindNESS.....

BUT ALL THAT ASIDE (just me not understanding people really) I had a brilliant time.  Little Bird is the newest of Kasey's album and is beautiful (as always!) and she played a few tunes from that album, but she re-visited all the favourites from her past, she entertained and treated us to a show with no bells and whistles, big bangs and a light show.  Just music and more music.  I loved it.  The Captain, is my favourite and has traveled with me for so many years check out the video on youtube

The Captain-Max Sessions

But The Captain inspired my thoughts below

I am not perfect
I lie
I bend the truth
I protect
I protect you
I hide
I love you
I am no-one
I owe you
I keep trying
I believe in you
I ask for seconds
I have found peace
I know my journey
I see
I see you
I know my dream
I feel
I will fight
I will fight for you
I resist change
I can't change
I won't change
I am
I am me

Tuesday, November 2, 2010


Hello, as the nausea sets in.  The remains of my sleepless night lingering in the air.  My dream broken as my agitated presence even makes me angry.  Wondering, why am I here?  Darkness has not yet lifted, silence and slowness fumble in the surrounds.  Where have all my dreams gone?  Straightening, slicing through the air, where is the vision I once saw so clearly, is it trapped in the night?

Monday, November 1, 2010


The cover new and flat
With empty sheets
As the coloured winged bird
Pecks at the pages
The tune played in my ear
Violins are pulled
As my heart shuts over
I want to fly away
Looking for my wings
To where birds don't live
In cages
But in trees
Fast playing piano
Directs my pace
Distressed from the rules
The expectation
The knowledge
No longer noticing the
Springs blossom
That once dressed my visions
I am hungry for its love
Its touch
The longing
My passion
To be told
And valued
To be enough
Amongst the earth
The weeds entangle my life
Grabbing at the earths skin
The new shoots of life frighten me
As the wattle falls
Around me
I cant breathe for fear of failing you
When is enough good
As my eyes are covered
In a deep purple pain
That you carry in a silver tin
Your silhouette
Still visible
Through falling tears
That wet the rich earth